May 24

She doesn't call me "Ma".  Maybe because I have a simple name, but, probably because I conditioned her to call me by name when I was really needed.

We've got some jokes about that around here where girls wanted to change her regular rant from "Help me Ma" to "Help me Mary".  I ended that.  No crying wolf while I'm around.  I know how to speak with 911 when needed.

Regardless, tonight (and last night) I heard her cries and they sounded different than all other shifts that I witness.  Tonight her rant was not "help me ma"... they were "stay away Ma", "stop hurting me Ma", "back down Ma".

I'm livid that I can't step in on these few shifts.  This third world country mid-30 something year old with 6 children is out to get me.  I need to keep to myself when she is around.

Who is suffering?  Hazel and me.

May 23

2013: I decided that "Askew" should be my word of the day.  The batteries in my fire alarm, two remotes and one mouse all decided to quit at once... the groundhog family seems to be befriending the German Shepherd and hanging out under my deck rather than in the burrows, and then I see that my friend has begun to dress her dog in rain gear... which, to me, is just plain wrong.

2015: I'm probably one of the few women around who DO NOT LIKE pedicures.  I like the results, but, the ticklish torture can make me procrastinate like there's no tomorrow.  I've gotta bite the bullet though… it's long overdue.

2015: Polka Dot paint job courtesy of #TheNPFlockOfCanadianGeese. What a mess.  PS.  Notice that blue sippy cup keeps showing up everywhere and every year I go…

2015: I really am blessed... there are a lot of good people out there and I've had the good fortune in life to meet so many.  Tonight I met with the "lone nut" who peaked my curiosity back in January with the Feed A Family Challenge - and we talked about Random Acts of Kindness, Pay it Forward.  We are a fit!!  Wait for all good things to come.

In case you forgot it a while back, I said you should grab onto my coattails because I've grabbed onto the angel wings that are going to make me soar.

2016: Memorializing a gift received that was given from the heart

2016: To me, living is loving.  I do that... in spite of the ambiguity.  Gilda was a trendsetter... I'm glad I was around to enjoy her.

2017: I've met A LOT of new people in the past year and I'm always surprised that I can go into a room full of people and not know even one person... I've been networking forever.

But tonight, the Director was the first person to greet me and he said, "I talked to my friend Mr. Harry today"... well let me tell you.. my grin was instantaneous...

If I had a Popeye chicken drumstick I would have raised it in a salute... It's very nice to know that people are keeping an eye on me.

2017: When I dance, I look like a soaking wet red fire truck.  Someone said, "it's your heritage, we don't hold that against you" 🙂 (love these people)

Yeah.. I'm Irish and I don't always embrace it... but, at least I'm not an orange republican...

2019: I could get the instant gratification of spending $40 bucks on Chinese for myself - or, I can deny myself the pleasure and throw that $40 to the $150 shopping list that I just made that will feed many people a variety of food for a couple/few weeks.

I hate these hard decisions because I usually make the right one. UGH...

2019: Do you know how happy it makes me when I walk into her room and she brightens up and says, "I've been wondering where you were". "It's bloody Mary, the girl that I love".

I always tell her that I am always upstairs... and I just come down when the sun is shining for deck visits or I can cook for her.  That's not really true... I come down to give meds when needed and to check on her overall well being.  She knows that.  That's why she likes me.  But, she doesn't always remember.  She is just conditioned by positive experiences.  I'm grateful for that.

She told me to get a handle on the people who provide me food to cook.  I've been working on that for months.

She is the biggest cutie pie I've met in years.  I think the feeling is so mutual that it makes my heart skip a beat. I didn't have this time with my own Mom.  Money doesn't buy Love....

May 22

2013: I decided that "Askew" should be my word of the day.  The batteries in my fire alarm, two remotes and one mouse all decided to quit at once... the groundhog family seems to be befriending the German Shepherd and hanging out under my deck rather than in the burrows, and then I see that my friend has begun to dress her dog in rain gear... which, to me, is just plain wrong.

2015: I'm probably one of the few women around who DO NOT LIKE pedicures.  I like the results, but, the ticklish torture can make me procrastinate like there's no tomorrow.  I've gotta bite the bullet though… it's long overdue.

2015: Polka Dot paint job courtesy of #TheNPFlockOfCanadianGeese. What a mess.  PS.  Notice that blue sippy cup keeps showing up everywhere and every year I go…

2015: I really am blessed... there are a lot of good people out there and I've had the good fortune in life to meet so many.  Tonight I met with the "lone nut" who peaked my curiosity back in January with the Feed A Family Challenge - and we talked about Random Acts of Kindness, Pay it Forward.  We are a fit!!  Wait for all good things to come.

In case you forgot it a while back, I said you should grab onto my coattails because I've grabbed onto the angel wings that are going to make me soar.

2016: Memorializing a gift received that was given from the heart

2016: To me, living is loving.  I do that... in spite of the ambiguity.  Gilda was a trendsetter... I'm glad I was around to enjoy her.

2017: I've met A LOT of new people in the past year and I'm always surprised that I can go into a room full of people and not know even one person... I've been networking forever.

But tonight, the Director was the first person to greet me and he said, "I talked to my friend Mr. Harry today"... well let me tell you.. my grin was instantaneous...

If I had a Popeye chicken drumstick I would have raised it in a salute... It's very nice to know that people are keeping an eye on me.

2017: When I dance, I look like a soaking wet red fire truck.  Someone said, "it's your heritage, we don't hold that against you" 🙂 (love these people)

Yeah.. I'm Irish and I don't always embrace it... but, at least I'm not an orange republican...

2019: I could get the instant gratification of spending $40 bucks on Chinese for myself - or, I can deny myself the pleasure and throw that $40 to the $150 shopping list that I just made that will feed many people a variety of food for a couple/few weeks.

I hate these hard decisions because I usually make the right one. UGH...

2019: Do you know how happy it makes me when I walk into her room and she brightens up and says, "I've been wondering where you were". "It's bloody Mary, the girl that I love".

I always tell her that I am always upstairs... and I just come down when the sun is shining for deck visits or I can cook for her.  That's not really true... I come down to give meds when needed and to check on her overall well being.  She knows that.  That's why she likes me.  But, she doesn't always remember.  She is just conditioned by positive experiences.  I'm grateful for that.

She told me to get a handle on the people who provide me food to cook.  I've been working on that for months.

She is the biggest cutie pie I've met in years.  I think the feeling is so mutual that it makes my heart skip a beat. I didn't have this time with my own Mom.  Money doesn't buy Love....

2020: Locked to a supporting beam in the basement of my house was my $400+ dollar all terrain trek bike spiffed up with $100-+ worth of custom accessories. I used to load it onto my car and take off all by myself for 20 mile rides. I racked up some serious miles on that bike. That bike could still be locked up in that basement unless the lock was cut and the bike sold by someone with no shame.

Tomorrow I’m buying a run of the mill bike off a FB friend that I’ve never met face to face. I need to find a lock. And then, I’m making a promise to myself to do a reverse route ride from the freshwater pond that I live by to the salt water beach of my youth...

History repeating itself in reverse. Is that a thing?

May 21

2009: this actually smells better than it looks!

2010: second year rose bush - first bloom… share the joy!

2013: It's very humbling to see/hear/read how calm and loving people can be in the face of death and total devastation.  It all makes me think that I need to get a better grip on my attitude and temper.  I'm glad that I have faith in a forgiving God.

2016: This is my new sippy cup.  I can't tell you how aggravated I was when I broke my last sippy cup a couple of days ago.  I made a special trip tonight to get a few more.  I just couldn't think about enjoying a Sunday morning without one.  One of those 'simple pleasures'.

2016: Singing - "Memories light the corners of my mind… Misty water-colored memories of the way we were… Scattered pictures of the smiles we left behind… Smiles we gave to one another for the way we were…"  You know who you are 🙂 ❤

2017: I'm back on the grid. New phone, new number, clean slate, next chapter started. It feels good.

2017: I haven't been to mindful with homework these days because some of it is already learned and I'm just brushing up.  But I have a big homework assignment during the next couple weeks.  I have to write (long hand, no copy/pasting of script) javascript code to computerize this childhood game.

I hope it's not as difficult as activating my phone...

2018: One of my long time clients was tanked by 3:00 today when I called him about product renewals.  He's the second to last client who isn't on auto-renewals already.  I see him once a year.  He got cantankerous with me and told me that I don't visit him enough.

I'm not a daytime drinker and it's just a Monday for me. I seldom need to get stern with clients but today I made him very quickly understand that he needed some sleep before he made a rash decision.  Glad he heard me and got off the phone with a meeting time and a "thank you sweet heart".

2018: Curiouser and curiouser... I will admit that I lost a lot of interest in political strategy when death and dying took over for a couple years... but, WOW, do I have a lot of catching up to do...

2018: My 10 minute Uber trips could be a show.  Particularly when I get a repeat driver.

Want coffee?  No. Want a banana? Hell yes.  No bananas, got a second choice?  Yes, hershey bar.

#payitforward when I can.  Learn a whole lot more about people on the rides back. It's an experience...

2019: 8 months and 20 days.  That's 262 days.  That's 6,288 hours that I have been available to keep the Queen of the house safe, healthy and happy.  I think I've done A-OK no matter what language you understand.

I'm glad I've shared my journey.  I'm not paid to be here.  This comes from the ❤.

2019: This is why I prep food on weekends. 15 minutes to table.

  • Me: We're having chicken... do you want pasta or potato and vegetables?
  • She: What's the potato and vegetable?  (a question I ask at EVERY restaurant)
  • Me: We've got roasted sweet potatoes, mashed, roasted cauliflower and roasted tomatoes.
  • She: I like them all.
  • Me: Alrighty then...

She never eats it all... even on an 8 inch plate.  UNLESS it's boiled dinner or another favorite.  Asparagus, shrimp?  Devours that.  But, she ate enough to get her to take her night time meds.

I've made my own little game out of this gig.

I used to "put the apron on" and upsell anyone in the restaurant business.  Now I sing Anne Murray, the Carpenters,  play gin, cook and "put the apron on" to serve.

I do wish my own Mother were with it enough to enjoy my hidden talents.

2019: Love you my baby sister... How much I miss playing a part of it all.  I was lucky you were born to me and mine.  And I'm lucky that so many friends understand that.  Missing you but forever grateful... ❤

2019: Gund and I are a very good team, I hope you know.

May 20

2009: I’m going to add bok choy and Brussels sprouts to the garden this year… will try to save Jane from purchasing "million dollar vegetables" from cb!

2013: want to give a big shout out to all my accountant/tax prep friends... there are many good reasons that I navigated towards technology and marketing rather than accounting. Even when you do a great job organizing people’s financials, there is a certain stress level, lack of appreciation and woe that comes with the job. I wish nobody knew I used to do this stuff...

2014: Providence - one of the few places I know where they have to have all day security guard so people don't mess with the freshly poured cement. (I didn't take the picture until the nice dude left his seat to protect his identity)

2015: word of the day (month, year maybe) is Catharsis.

My sister was a "keeper of memories" as I am. She and I are both minimalist and only collected the most sentimental of things. Finding the source of those memories and giving them back to the rightful owners will be a heart wrenching, but, good experience for me. It's started already... Jane Mullen is still with us and giving back. I'm proud to be her sister.

2018: A lesson in perspective. You may say this is a glass half full. I will disagree. Because I remember when I poured that iced coffee this morning and heard a big crack. Then my iced coffee seeped through the crack into the outer pane.

Not only is this glass not half full but it's also not half empty. It's empty, it's broken and I have to throw it away.

2018:  Meghan Markle gets married and I’m thinking: In my mind, the baby girl is saying, Dear Mom, Thank you.  Thank you for leading the way and making me strong by example. Strong enough to face adversity. To hold on to the principles you taught and to spread the message to the world. To represent.

I say those things to my Mom even though she's not here. Today was a good day.

2019: "It's not the cough that will carry you off. It's the coffin they'll carry you off in"....a Hazelism.

2020: Lol!  I have been thinking a lot about those people I know who will only dine out if there’s a deep discount or will only order small portions, linger for hours and pull out a calculator to determine 15% gratuity....

Guess what?  That kind of stuff makes you memorable and chances are, you may not get a reservation anytime soon.

ANYONE who has worked in the industry for any amount of time has met one or two of these peeps and would agree unless they could incriminate themselves by doing so.

2020: I’m in a couple writers groups now and I enjoy it. Someone posted this picture and asked if this really happens. I couldn’t help but comment.

“This is just wrong on so many levels. I mean, why kill him off? My ex is a main character in my book and I know that he wants to crawl under a rock each time I write about him... I can tell because of my blog hits and his IP address. I want him to live forever for my karmic entertainment”

#CommunicatingForACause #marysworld #MemoriesOnThisDay #tenacious #underestimated #WhosSorryNow

May 19

2013: I decided that "Askew" should be my word of the day.  The batteries in my fire alarm, two remotes and one mouse all decided to quit at once... the groundhog family seems to be befriending the German Shepherd and hanging out under my deck rather than in the burrows, and then I see that my friend has begun to dress her dog in rain gear... which, to me, is just plain wrong.

2015: I'm probably one of the few women around who DO NOT LIKE pedicures.  I like the results, but, the ticklish torture can make me procrastinate like there's no tomorrow.  I've gotta bite the bullet though… it's long overdue.

2015: Polka Dot paint job courtesy of #TheNPFlockOfCanadianGeese. What a mess.  PS.  Notice that blue sippy cup keeps showing up everywhere and every year I go…

2015: I really am blessed... there are a lot of good people out there and I've had the good fortune in life to meet so many.  Tonight I met with the "lone nut" who peaked my curiosity back in January with the Feed A Family Challenge - and we talked about Random Acts of Kindness, Pay it Forward.  We are a fit!!  Wait for all good things to come.

In case you forgot it a while back, I said you should grab onto my coattails because I've grabbed onto the angel wings that are going to make me soar.

2016: Memorializing a gift received that was given from the heart

2016: To me, living is loving.  I do that... in spite of the ambiguity.  Gilda was a trendsetter... I'm glad I was around to enjoy her.

2017: I've met A LOT of new people in the past year and I'm always surprised that I can go into a room full of people and not know even one person... I've been networking forever.

But tonight, the Director was the first person to greet me and he said, "I talked to my friend Mr. Harry today"... well let me tell you.. my grin was instantaneous...

If I had a Popeye chicken drumstick I would have raised it in a salute... It's very nice to know that people are keeping an eye on me.

2017: When I dance, I look like a soaking wet red fire truck.  Someone said, "it's your heritage, we don't hold that against you" 🙂 (love these people)

Yeah.. I'm Irish and I don't always embrace it... but, at least I'm not an orange republican...

2019: I could get the instant gratification of spending $40 bucks on Chinese for myself - or, I can deny myself the pleasure and throw that $40 to the $150 shopping list that I just made that will feed many people a variety of food for a couple/few weeks.

I hate these hard decisions because I usually make the right one. UGH...

2019: Do you know how happy it makes me when I walk into her room and she brightens up and says, "I've been wondering where you were". "It's bloody Mary, the girl that I love".

I always tell her that I am always upstairs... and I just come down when the sun is shining for deck visits or I can cook for her.  That's not really true... I come down to give meds when needed and to check on her overall well being.  She knows that.  That's why she likes me.  But, she doesn't always remember.  She is just conditioned by positive experiences.  I'm grateful for that.

She told me to get a handle on the people who provide me food to cook.  I've been working on that for months.

She is the biggest cutie pie I've met in years.  I think the feeling is so mutual that it makes my heart skip a beat. I didn't have this time with my own Mom.  Money doesn't buy Love....

May 18

1997:  A Party Girl With A Cause - AKA A Party With A Purpose

1997 A Party Girl With A Cause

1997 A Party Girl With A Cause

2017 She (with a scowl): why are you taking pictures?

Me: because I'm in web development and social media marketing so I take pictures of everything.

#myhouse #mydeck #mychairs #myglasses #mycamera #myblog my #memoriesonthisday your #mistake #May18

2018: FB didn't send me this memory of "this day in 2017" because I was afraid to post it then But, I took pictures and I'm not afraid to tell the truth anymore. Last year was a chapter worth documenting.

2019: I'm in perennial paradise today. Hazel told me to thank the birds for the planting... I know better. I’ll share pictures after the sun goes down.

2019: She has a huge tree in the yard that sheds a lot of shade and she planted all the shade loving flowers she could find.

When I reminded her today that she fibbed to me that the birds planted all these seeds, she denied it adamantly.

This is a shade loving garden planted with love... the roses will be popping up next. She didn't come out with me today so I brought the lilac smell inside to her.

2019: And, I cooked.

  • Roasted sweet potatoes and roasted tomatoes. Sautéed onions, peppers and chicken.
  • Chicken, peppers, onion, roasted tomato and Swiss Calzone.
  • Steak, peppers, onions and tropical cheese (is what she called it) calzone.
  • Chicken fingers... I had no bread crumbs so I did with Saltines like Mom did in a pinch. Had to use butter in the pan because of that. Butter makes everything better 🙂

(It's nice when I emerge from the attic)

2019:  I was with the dude for 20 years.  To think I don't know the habits by now is short sighted.  I know those visits to Bonnet Shores Beach Club for High, Lo, Jack night are an important part of your week.  I also bet if there is drinking and drugging going on that it warrants a special "Viagra Night".  Been there, done that.

So, how cool is it of me to post juicy stuff that you would rather ignore on those special occasions?  And get hundreds of readers from our shared "hood".  That kind of sharing will not combat a Viagra hard-on.  So lay back and take it or be on all fours... he doesn't care.

2020: I think it was 2016 when they hooked up first.  I've got some of their “nakedness” photos saved in my arsenal that kind of tell me a story... or, at least they fill in the blanks of the narrative I already know.

I know what was in it for him.  He had no car, no money and he wasn't getting any sex from me.  I was dealing with the facts of life and a whole lot of deaths and he just couldn't cut it.  Willing and available tramps come in handy at times like those.  Good riddance.  I flew away on my own accord.  I even turned down advances while the tramp was already in tow.  Yay for me.

I was at a time of weakness when their real attacks began.  I backed off.  I was scared of just how far the vindictiveness would go.  I took the abuse, I lost a lot and I paid a lot.  But, I survived and I'm coming into my own, on my own and much stronger than I was when I was being kicked while down.

I'm looking forward to telling more stories.  I’ll be opening up some eyes to the reality of the situation.  The Judge told me I have freedom of speech.  My fierce brother Michael who had lethal hands and feet taught me that words are the greatest weapon in the world.  And I've got the words and I've got stories pouring out of my pores.

If my attackers have got souls, they will read them and weep.  I'm not going to hold my breath.

May 16

2020:  Since the stay home orders, the neighbors wife kicks him to the garage or yard every day which means he’s just a couple yards from me. I’ve been tolerating. But after power washing from 10-4, he just started blasting heavy metal. There is a civil way I deal with issues like this if I need to.

Gospel music on the Bluetooth Bose sound dock for a sing along is one method. Christmas music in May will work too.
Ahhh... as if he was reading my mind, the screaming just stopped.

May 12

2015:  Sometime soon before my sister Janie died on April 1, 2015, she told me she was going to be famous because of her facebook page.  I don't think dying and having her sister and friends sharing her posts is what she had in mind, but, that's the way it's been happening.

Some people get signs from those that they loved and lost.  I get direct messages from Janie.  All of her friends do too.  And sometimes I think that she purposely wrote heartfelt messages to me so I could read time and time again, but, that's not true unless she was a prophet here on Earth.

During the week of my sisters death and memorial service, facebook rolled out the "on this day" feature to their social media platform.  On May 12th 2015, I received the first message from my heavenly sister -

"I can be a *%%$%^ during some of this stuff but just know how much I appreciate you always being there to support me!! Love u!"

I wouldn't be surprised if my sister is guiding Zuckerberg to do her bidding.  Did she know something that I didn't?  Did she post posts to all of us knowing that we would all get her messages as the years progressed?  Her messages to me were so loving that when I read them they take my breath away.  The way she loved and appreciated me gives my life merit.

She always lets her presence be known when I need it.  And this week was no different.

On Sunday, May 10th 2020, prior to seeing this May 12th post, I realized what the book I'm writing will be called.  It just came to me like a lightbulb being turned on in my brain.

When I saw this post today and read that the "on this day" feature was rolled out right when Janie died... and then in more recent times evolved into the "Memories" feature - I knew it was a sign.

Prior to reading all that, on Sunday May 10th 2020, I named my book.  And public records show that I also scored the matching domain name on that same day.

#MemoriesOnThisDay